...a million apologies...

Please accept my apology for not writing...I've gotten away and am coming back to you as soon as timer permits. So much has happened and though I cannot recap here and now I will as soon as i can...

#Obama #Shell #GasPrices #Environment

I have a deep love in my heart for now president Barack Obama, his lovely wife Michelle, and his two sweet daughters. I have been in such blind agreeance with his administration that even though I've heard elsewhere that he respresented the banking industry, I still supported him. I have been disassociative with those that didn't support him and still humming 'Yes We Can' when I see him. Dammit. I hate when I am hoodwinked, hustled and lied to.
Front page Houston Chronicle reads this morning that They have cleared Shell to begin seeking permits to drill 130 miles off the coast of Louisianna. What I hate is this...and hate is a big word...less than one year has passed since the BP Horizon Spill leaked an estimated 206 million gallons of crude oil into the Gulf of Mexico which killed all types of wildlife, 10 people, left the gulf full of dispersants, and left oil still currently stuck to the Gulf floor.
Obama imposed a 7 year ban on drilling in the Gulf December 01, 2010 and in less than 4 months later that statement is as if it had never been uttered. Well I notice and I'm not pleased, quite frankly I'm angry.  The drilling companies have leaned on the Obama Administration to allow drilling once again and now that the uprising in Libya has held up a curtain of distraction, they slipped it in under the labels of 'confidence' and 'heightened environmental standards'.
I paid spent $20 yesterday morning @ $3.55 per gallon that my car computer says is going to take me 95 miles. I'm being hustled. When Obama was sworn in gas prices were $1.89 a gallon, but have since risen to as high as $3.79. Right NOW the Conoco on Old Spanish Trail @ Kirby is $3.69. I've been paying on average $2.89 - $3.29 per gallon for what seems like forever, but that has held steady and I'm thinking about car pooling, catching some buses, syphoning some gas...something's gotta give. In one hand you take into consideration gas prices and Oil riggers being out of work, but in the other hand we must be held responsible for our environment.

If we are going to carry on growing, and we will, because no country is going to forfeit its right to economic growth, we have to find a way of doing it sustainably - Tony Blair

Chris Brown Pics, NateDogg, Japan, Libya and Basketball Wives...

Happy Spring Break!
The kiddos are home and hopefully u r 2...I'm not, but that's ok...Here's some news and opinion for those that have been hiding literally under a rock.

Nood Chris Brown photos leaked recently, leaving my favorite youngsta crush bubbling over...then a promo photo showed him puffing a cigarillo....breathless. I need to get a grip cause he's getting ridiculous cool points with me...gosh. There was some talk that he wasn't packing, too thin...blah blah woompty whomp...lol. Whatever! I'm not on some motion in the ocean talk, but women rate men on some unbelievable D scales. Maybe it's the men too...not sure, but that's a nice size peen and a wonderful looking guy attached to it. Thank you Chris for that shot...my imagination can take care of the rest. Wink

Nate Dogg

The greatest Hook-Man ever passed away on Tuesday March 15 from complications from multiple strokes. He is well loved and will be missed greatly, I'm sure that his family feels the sadness and support that we have for them.

Japan suffered a 9.0 magnitude earthquake last Friday March 11th, followed by a devastating tsunami and many aftershocks that left a presumed 13,000 dead or missing. The aftermath that followed is incredible and has me wondering if this country will be able to rebound. Japan has the 3rd strongest economy, but because of the damage to four nuclear plants, and subsequent radiation leaks the citizens are leaving in droves. Emperor Akihito addressed the nation in an exceptional manner as sitting emperors typically do not address the citizens amid such crisis, asking them to not lose hope and remain strong.

Americans are again collecting money to send to the people there, like recent efforts to Haiti, India, and Katrina. This time I can't afford it...Sorry Japan I have some bills that require some belt tightening and serious attention. I wish them well and advise them to get the hell outta Japan without haste. Radiation is no issue to which you ponder on for any real length of time...leave. I remember when I was a little girl my school took up a project to make thousands and thousands of these little origami cranes for those affected by the Hiroshima bombing and subsequent radiation effects. I hated that project...so I implore the Japanese to leave while the effects are still manageable.

Libyans are giving up on getting Qaddafi's out of office because of recent attacks on the rebellion/ protesters. There is some doubt arising that getting Qaddafi out will ever come to pass. But I still support the rebellion. I'm applauding, waiting and watching, hoping the rebellion survives and removes Qaddafi and institute a true democratic system.

Basketball Wives
This past Sunday March 13, Basketball wives aired the finale and shameful shameful acts were displayed and mostly on Evelyn Lozada's impart. Evelyn has been called out three times this season for actually having sex. I am not the judge but if you're gonna be screwing around, do it in private. Letting to many people into your business is immature and the counteract wont be in your favor. Men are not attracted to even the most beautiful woman if she has dirt surrounding her...men are not that feeble and are not totally consumed by arm candy. Evelyn made herself look easy and shallow. How she responded to Ocho when he asked her why she thought he had brought her to Cincinnati was not graceful and frankly, I was embarrassed for her. He obviously was shocked but went with it both times u came so aggressively onto him...firstly at the table in discussion about he flew her to Cincinnati for sex and then when she came down the stairs in lingerie. Maybe her loneliness or thirst was more than she could handle and this was how she planned to gain at least a lay and fame simultaneously. I guess she really appreciated him gifting her those flowers, boots and airfare.

VBS Meets Sizzla

Outkast - Babylon

Outkast - Babylon

I came into this world high as a bird...from second hand cocain powder...i know it sounds absurd
I never tooted but its in my veins...while the rest of the country bungies off bridges...without no snap back
and bitches they say they need that...to shake they fannies in the ass clubs
they go the other route...turn each other out...burn each other out...where a bonified nigga like me can't even get no back rub these days
ain't that bleak on they part...
but let me hold it down...cause they shut you down...when you speak from your heart...now that's hard...while we rantin and ravin bout gats

nigga they made them gats...they got some shit that'll blow out our backs...from where they stay at

I fear the battle's just begun
though we're here someday we will be gone...so i'm hopin, wishin, prayin...to keep my faith in you, in you

What I'm listening to: Kelis - Guilty

Girls have minds of their own

Don't know why
But my thoughts are completely Out of control
I feel everytime
I'm all alone
I want to let this go
Cause I'm just feeling so damn..

Guilty, just wrong and guilty
He won't get out of my mind
Its all the time its filthy,
Im guilty, dead wrong and guilty
Cause what he does to me inside my dreams
Just makes me feel guilty
Guilty, just wrong and guilty
He won't get out of my mind
Its all the time its filthy,
Im guilty, dead wrong and guilty
Cause what he does to me inside my dreams
Just makes me feel..

Guilty, just wrong and guilty
He won't get out of my mind
Its all the time its filthy,
Im guilty, dead wrong and guilty
Cause what he does to me inside my dreams
Just makes me feel guilty

Guilty, just wrong and guilty
He won't get out of my mind
Its all the time its filthy,
Im guilty, dead wrong and guilty
Cause what he does to me inside my dreams
Just makes me feel..

Wish I could shake this
I'm acting so selfish
How can I do this
What the hell am I thinking
What am I thinking
Wish I could shake this
Im acting so foolish
How can I do this
What the hell am I thinking..

But I feel...
Guilty, just wrong and guilty
He won't get out of my mind
Its all the time its filthy,
Im guilty, dead wrong and guilty
Cause what he does to me inside my dreams
Just makes me feel guilty
Guilty, just wrong and guilty
He won't get out of my mind
Its all the time its filthy,
Im guilty, dead wrong and guilty
Cause what he does to me inside my dreams
Just makes me feel..

Buju Banton Convicted...

Yesterday Buju Banton was found guilty in a florida court of conspiracy to possess with intent to distribute five or more kilograms of coke, possession of a firearm in furtherance of a drug-trafficking offense and using the wires to facilitate a drug-trafficking offense. He was found not guilty on the charge of attempted possession of a firearm with the attempt to distribute. He awaits sentencing.

They say Buju told an informant that he could easily broker the big drug deal. However, Banton testified in court that he was talking sshit, with prosecutors conceding that he had never put any money into a deal.

Buju now faces 15 years in prison at the least. Much of the case rested on both video and audio recordings made by the informant and the US DEA. The informant received $50,000 after Banton was arrested in December 2009, along with two others.
One of the videos showed Banton tasting coke in a warehouse. A co-defendant apparently later gave the informant just over $135,000 and, along with another man, he has pleaded guilty to all the drug charges against Buju's name.

Buju Banton had a conversation with a paid government informer on a an airplane from Spain to the USA, after which he remained to have contact with this informer.

Then, there are two other people arrested together with him. One of them initially signed a statement saying Buju Banton has nothing to do with the cokane case these people might or might not be involved in. However, both men have joined Babylon and are now accusing Buju Banton in order to get a lower sentence themselves. when the government can't get their evidence, they just intimidate you and say: "plea guilty, we will lower the sentence".

Plea-deals are an abomination, both for truth-finding and for the overall sense of justice. How many people have actually said they were guilty of a crime they did not commit, only because if they keep sticking to the truth they will serve much longer in these prisons?

I think Buju used some but not brokered them...

Lybian Egyptian Evolution - Outting Mubarak & al-Gaddafi

Lybia is feeling the rippling liberation spreading through the middle east in the wake of Cairo protesters demanding the resignation of Hosni Mubarak, their president since 1981 (hardly two years after I was born). Mubarak's resignation on February 11, 2010 is an indication that corrupt and oil wealthy leaders of the middle east are in their last stages and that democracy is near.
Lybia's Leader and Guide of the Revolution, Muammar Abu Minyar al-Gaddafi has been in office since 1969, and is accused of genocide and other crimes against humanity by his own regime, but vows to fight to the last drop of blood after the Lybian Opposition has taken control over most towns.

These leaders are sour I'm sure. Mubarak is rumored to have cancer and slipping in and out of consciousness, writing his memoirs and bidding farewell...requesting to die as a martyr. al-Gaddafi on the other hand is preparing to sabotage the oil industry by blowing up pipelines, using his wealth and his remaining 5,000 loyal troops to fight for a very long time, vowing to turn Lybia into another Somalia.
A few weeks ago I overheard a conversation by three men discussing why they aren't really supporting the uprising in Egypt, saying that the Egypt protesters didn't support the blacks in America during the Civil right movement. How petty.
People aren't separated by language, race, religion or boundaries, but to me, by culture...who gathers together in tough times. And I, as a black single-mother in Houston Texas, United States support the people having a chance to command their own lives, and spell out for themselves what makes them happy. I encourage them to continue to assess the current state and address their needs together, thinking through each possible scenario carefully.
I wait for North Korea, China, Sudan, Burma, Haiti, Uzbekistan, Iran, Saudi Arabia, Eritrea, Cuba, Syria, Vietnam, and Ethiopia...Come forward.
The time is now. Leaders like Idi Amin, Saddam Hussein, Adolf Hitler, Stalin, Jean-Claude Duvalier, and the 1st through 15th American presidents deserved to be contested. Wrong deserves to be righted.
I'm impressed and hope everyone gets a chance in life to live happily.

What I'm listening to....

Sunshine Anderson - U Doin' It

Oprah's Mother Vernita Lee and Her Bag of Secrets

Recently Oprah came forward to reveal that she had a half-sister named Patricia, given up for adoption by her mother Vernita Lee.
Oprah stated that Patricia had contacted Vernita several times in an attempt to reunite, but each offer was declined. Patricia was persistent and finally reached out to Oprah's camp. Oprah decided to meet with Patricia since Patricia was not trying to double deal or sell her story, but genuinely wanted to connect with a family she was related to.
Upon the reveal, Vernita, per reports, collapsed. Friends and family are fearful now of a stroke. Vernita isn't doing well.
While this story is probably more common than not, I don't think the process for the adopted seeking out birth mothers is good. I am a very present and realistic person, preferring to deal with the here and now, rather than the invariable what ifs. Asking myself what would have been if this or that...had I been skinny, or tall, white, male, rich, whatever...etc.
Being mature and realistic, women who give their children up for adoption may miss their children but most live with the secret until they die, never giving any detail about adoptions. That is very sad and unnecessary. We should be more forgiving in regards to women and pregnancy.
Adoptions are so quick and hush-hush, It's really sad how easily children are given up without regard for perhaps another family member taking in the child, or the father asked to have either him or his family members take in the child. Adoptive families care little for the situation of the birth mother and most don't want a relationship with her. These decisions are made on the child's behalf and once the child grows into an adult, it's sad again that the child seeks out the birth mother.

I can only imagine they want to see if they look alike, if they will connect, find out the story of their conception, clues to who the father may be, if there are siblings, if they know....just resurrecting all kinds of skeletons...which leads me to confusion.

I would only make one recommendation to birth mothers, to deal with the baby, assume responsibility, or anonymously give the baby up for adoption. Your name is not required to give a baby away. To leave your name and contact information is enticing to an adopted person. If you don't want to be found, then don't leave any clues.
I'm on the side of right. In terms of becoming pregnant by mistake, it can happen, does happen, and not all the time is the mother married, stable, competent, prepared, capable of being a good mother or provide a good life for a child. So yes, adoption is an option, but prevention is the key.

We as women have to be more transparent with our daughters in educating them these exact example situations. My grandmother would say 'what is done in the dark will come to light', or the other 'that what doesn't come out in the wash comes out in the rinse'.

Vernita Lee is a common typed woman, same situations as many so no judgements there. But rest assured that this isn't the only secret that woman has. She was saved by a system to relocate an unwanted baby to a family that wanted one. Great for the child, and great that she could swallow her pride to offer this child a possibly better life.

Patricia is owed something though, maybe the reuniting she has received, but perhaps she deserves a mother and father who is cautious, unfailing, loving and providing. I'm sorry for Patricia and for anyone who has been abandoned by their parents. This world is cold and mean, and parents are one of the essential elements in learning how to navigate though this. Adoptive parents are a saving grace, bless them.
So if Vernita Lee is palpitating somewhere, it's because she needs to confront her past, mend, rectify, or apologize for shit.
I encourage her though. I encourage her to erect herself, assess her life, reach back and fix whatever it is that she needs to to feel that she is accountable for her actions. I wouldn't worry about feeling like a loose woman, or how it makes you feel like a bad mother. We have all fallen, no one is righteous enough to judge except for the good father.
I encourage you as well, not simply to be accountable and assume responsibility, but to forgive and allow wrongs to be righted by sincere apology.